RADIOHEAD
Amnesiac (Capitol)
Reviewed by Jason Thornberry

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I just got an e-mail from a friend who stood in line for a Radiohead/Sigur Ros gig. While I am actually curious to see Sigur Ros, I think I'd rather masturbate with finely shaved glass than sit thru the shite, pretentious bore-dumb that Radioheadupanus just shat out onto a new compact disc for the very gullible listening public to snatch up.

Gee! It’s been just six months since the "Brilliant" Kid A, and they say there's a new one already in the can for Xmas!

Radiohead aren't "visionaries", they're shrewd businessmen! Right now I can name off dozens, no, hundreds, nay, thousands of faaar superior albums to buy than anything those dickheads are even capable of imagining. Ever notice how Radiohead always look deep in thought whenever a camera is near? That’s because they're the next U2! Utter twats who would try to peddle CD-R’s of Thom Yorke saddled with a bout of explosive diarrhea in an echoey public washroom if they thought someone, anyone would buy it.

Amnesiac is available in a "limited" edition booklet form for the idiots out there who were so easily duped into purchasing the last CD when it was released the same way.

Oh yeah, the album review!

Ummm...this sounded like OK Computer and The Bends. I don't even wanna hear about that old man who plays on the album this time either. Wow! That's swell! Why not give him your royalty checks, boys?! And Mr. Yorke's weedy voice about sent me over the edge too. Yeah, Radiohead are shittin' ca$h, but I had to spend five years looking for anything by the Cardiacs, who are all probably very lucky to have week old, pissed on oatmeal for dinner. Makes perfect sense to me.

© 2001 - Jason Thornberry