IN THIS ISSUE OF COSMIK DEBRIS: It's our 8th Anniversary and we've cooked up a celebration on an issue! First off, as always on our anniversary, we have summed up our year in Cosmik Conversations. Come time trippin' with us! We also talked with Carlos Guitarlos (of Top Jimmy and the Rhythm Pigs) about what he's been up to, Janis Siegel (of Manhattan Transfer) told us about her Friday Night Special, and we uncovered a bunch of bizarre 13 O'Clock news stories, one of which is frighteningly true. More than enough CD & Record reviews to go around, plus Everything Else reviewed, along with the usual fine columns... it's a feast! Enjoy it with us!

COSMIK RADIO!: We heard the government was trying to rush a bill through that would make it easy for one company to own all the entertainment and news sources, both broadcast and print, in America. This freaked us out, so we took a cue from CCR and went on a run through the jungle to avoid being assimilated. You just need a RealAudio Player to listen. If you don't have one, go pick one up. Cosmik Radio is just the kind of Net-Only audio that radio station program directors don't want you getting hooked on. So go ahead. Inhale!

ANOTHER YEAR OF COSMIK CONVERSATIONS - It's June again, and that means it's time for another edition of Cosmik Conversations. It's been a diverse year for us, as usual, as we have interviewed everyone from one man band inferno Bob Log III, to Frank Discussion of the Feederz, to bassist extraordinaire Bob Daisley, to art car creator and documentarian Harrod Blank. Have fun experiencing the finer moments of these conversations with us!

CARLOS GUITARLOS - JUST BEEN DOIN' WHAT HE DOES: Top Jimmy and the Rhythm Pigs were Los Angeles' most notorious band, as well as its best, in the early 80s, due in part to Carlos Guitarlos. An incredible guitar player, he was also rude, obnoxious, mean... an asshole, really. He dropped out of the LA scene for about 15 years. Where he was, what he's been doing, and what he's up to now make an interesting story, one he told to DJ Johnson and is passed on to you here.

JANIS SIEGEL - You know her voice as part of the Manhattan Transfer, and Janis Siegel has an interesting and diverse solo career as well. Her seventh solo album, Friday Night Special, is performed with a classic organ-tenor group and produced by Joel Dorn. Shaun Dale caught up with her for a few minutes out of her busy schedule to ask her about this album, how she got here, and where she'd like to go next...

TIME FOR THE THIRTEEN O'CLOCK NEWS - Our government is rebuilding Iraq, controlling our minds, and providing us with a great new reality show; Bob Hope is turning 100; there was going to be a woman on the PGA tour; and Bush and Blair have been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize. Read all about these and other stories (don't miss the new Consumer Squealer section, where this month we focus on the writer's flaccid penis... no, his friend's...) in the 13 O'Clock News.



CD & RECORD REVIEWS - We've got more than 111 reviews for you this month, from Aaron to Zeke with sixteen VA's along the way, from punk to blues to comedy to orchestrette - there is more than one thing in here for everybody and plenty to go around.

EVERYTHING ELSE IN REVIEW - Don't know when these writers sleep... in addition to all those CD & Record reviews, they reviewed Everything Else for ya too! Lotsa stuff in here to look at.



CLOSET PHILOSOPHY - It's commencement address time again and Rusty has some advice for the Class of 2003. Buy low, sell high, and of course there's more...

PIGSHIT by GARY PIG GOLD - They just keep dyin'. This month, Gary says goodbye to someone who never really got the credit he deserved as a pioneering musician.

MASS APPEAL MADNESS - Curse Ov Dialect: Anyone with a straight face, a clown wig, and a microphone just can't be real hip-hop, but somehow it is this time.

MEDIA CURMUDGEON - Our media watchdog, Karl Cable, has an eye on the FCC, and a warning about what could be about to happen in your town.



CREDITS - The names and e-mail addresses of the people responsible for this thing.

COSMIK RADIO - Want an hour of music that fits the personality of Cosmik Debris Magazine? That's right, Sinatra segues into Megadeth into Peter Tosh into Man Or Astro-Man into... well, you get the picture. It's a little something we like to call Genre Whiplash. Or maybe you're in the mood for a trip into The Fog Machine, our mix of music of the ethereal variety. All you need is a RealAudio player. Come on in.

OUR OWN WEBSITES - Many of the Cosmik Debris writers have websites of their own. We have some links right here.



Eight years may not sound like much to you, but it's a lifetime to an eight year old. And to those of us who've been putting out. Cosmik Debris, that is. I remember where I was when I heard that Kennedy was shot (both of 'em), King was shot, Lennon was shot, my Vega's stupid aluminum block engine was shot and we'd had our first 1,000 reader month. I was sitting at my desk on each of those occasions. I don't get around much. The fact that I was only 4 when JFK was shot and yet I was sitting at my office desk makes it abundantly clear that 1) I was born for this job and 2) I was a boring child with no friends or I would have been out playing in the sandbox. Little has changed. I still have no friends, I still have the very same desk, which I steady between my ankles as I lean down to type, and I spell just as poorly as I did when I was 4. The main difference? Eh... There isn't one. Everybody has their shortcomings, right? When we started Cosmik Debris 95 issues ago, the editor's notes included this bit of information:

"Hello, and welcome to the first issue of Cosmic Debris. My name is DJ Johnson, and my qualifications for running an E-zine are as follows. I love music, I care about politics and I have a computer. Serious inquiries from mega-buck magazines who wish to employ me should be faxed. I haven't got a fax machine, but then that's probably a moot point, doncha think? English is our second language here at the plush Cosmic Debris Office Compound. We don't have a first language as of yet, but we're open to suggestions. This means, basically, that grammar and spelling sit just below "finishing our vegetables" on our priority list. Don't let it bug ya."

Yes, "Cosmic" Debris. We got an e-mail from someone saying he really loved our magazine, and he also loved our name, and he'd also loved it when he'd thought to name HIS magazine Cosmic Debris years earlier. Turned out to be a nice guy who let us change to Cosmik with a k. Good thing, as I'd spent four months of sleepless nights sending countless e-mails to artists and record labels establishing our presence. Wanna know the funny part? I was naming the magazine, at the suggestion of Cai Campbell, one of the original staff members, after the song "Cosmik Debris" to honor Frank Zappa, but being somewhat thick I didn't know it was spelled with a k. Look up "serendipity" and you'll find a picture of the plush Cosmik Towers. We've run into serendipitous situations many times since, and so far we've come out ahead. Keep your fingers crossed for the future.

We hope you enjoy the 8th anniversary issue of Cosmik Debris Magazine. Better get to it. There's a lot to read. See you next month. And by the way, thank you for hanging with us all these years. We've been having a blast.

Sincerely,
DJ Johnson
Editor

Did you miss an issue? We now have many of our back issues online, including sound clips and extras. Check out interviews with The Witches, Electric Frankenstein, the Vampire Beach Babes, Jeff Berlin, Curve, Michael Shermer, Steel Pulse, Transglobal Underground, Mark Helm, The Southern Rock All-Stars, Ottmar Liebert, Jason Noble of Shipping News, Phil Vassar, Joel Dorn, Mark Cline of Love Tractor, Texas Terri (of Texas Terri & The Stiff Ones), Mike Keneally, Chris Shinn of Unified Theory, Alley of Wise Monkey Orchestra, Mario Escovedo of The Dragons, The Clarks, Big Ass Truck, Richard Cheese, Paul Krassner, Tony Iommi, Ron Dante...