DYSRHYTHMIA
pretest (Relapse Recs)
Reviewed by Jason Thornberry


I could tell within a few seconds that, yes, checking the cd insert, Steve Albini, the producer of Nirvana's final full-length album, had lent his signature sound to this Philadelphia four piece. They're in for it now, and you can hear "it" in the dehydration of the drums, and actually in the room itself whenever the instruments paused a moment to let their own everything reverberate and fade. It's a good job Dysrythmia is an instrumental group, since any vocalist would be flummoxed to find a spot to anywhere drop a verse that's free from overindulgence and testicle sweat.

I waited for more than three minutes for at least a "Yeah!" to tell me that "Bastard" was a stretched-out intro. That opening track was similar to a rock orchestra warming up, but, like most attempts at making rock palatable to jazz heads, pretest never went anywhere. This was ultimately an expen$ive rehearsal tape, and that's my problem with Albini -- everything he does is so stripped-down and bare that the songs lack momentum. Imagine a Jeep stuck in the mud with this on the stereo.

Look, just because a band noodles about for nearly an hour doesn't mean that they're "jazzy." I saw that term mentioned a few times in Dysrhythmia's press kit, and it's offensive to anyone who plays or has ever played jazz music. While jazz is often about the abstract, and painting with sound, pretest subscribes to the format of fucking around aimlessly like stoned, talented twats who can't find a singer. Fodder for guys who work at Guitar Center and practice with the hand grip gel device on their lunch break so they can show you arpeggios when you only fucking want guitar strings. Guys like that love this crap.

pretest is 53.08 of the drummer and his chops, which he's more than happy to show off to the rest of the band, who follow him in tired circles. I got up, made dinner, came back and listened to it again an hour later, and had already forgotten almost everything. Is that what you want from an album? If it is, then sell everything you've got and just purchase this one.

RATING: D

© 2003 - Jason Thornberry