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[The following interview is transcribed from John Sekerka's radio
show,
Tape Hiss, which runs on CHUO FM in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada and is also run in
John's
own magazine, Thrust. On occassion, Cosmik
Debris prints a transcript of one of these interviews, simply because John lives
3000
miles away and doesn't have a car OR a lawyer. This month, we're proud to bring
you
Vampire Beach Babes. - Ed.]
Goths with a sense of humour? Who woulda thunk it? Allaway from the dark and
creepy Canuck ville of Toronto, come the Vampire Beach Babes. It's the Adams
Family with guitars invading Frankie and Annette's squeaky clean beach. What
fun!
John: Say, I quite like yer tune "Horshoes (Up My Ass)." Who
put horseshoes up
yer ass?
Horny Babe: Well, you know it was some time ago . . .
Whiskey Babe: Yes, back in Rome, in 5 or 6 BC. And I
seem to recall that a
lot of wine was involved, but other than that the details are somewhat sketchy.
John: How does that feel?
Horny Babe: Well it's a bitch at the airport metal
detectors, but other than
that it feels just fine.
John: What're you doing for Halloween?
Bunny Babe: We're playing the Fetish Masquerade at the
Reverb Club in Toronto.
John: Hey you were on that Goth comp a coupla years
ago, along with big time
ghouls like Sisters of Mercy and Bauhaus. Who'd ya sleep with to get on that
disc?
Whiskey Babe: Nobody actually.
Horny Babe: Although God knows we tried.
Whiskey Babe: Yeah, there were some fine looking
women at that label.
Seriously though, it was a real kick to be on that CD - Gothic Sanctuary. They
chose us because they wanted to show that Goth is still alive and kicking, and
that it has continued to evolve.
John: What'dya think of that Bauhaus reunion?
Don't-You-Dare-Call-Me-Babe Babe: I didn't.
Whiskey Babe: Hey, they were pioneers in their time.
And I was
taught to respect my
elders.
John: Goths have been getting a bad name from day one.
Why is that?
Horny Babe: Day one ... do you remember that Ricky?
[Pictured: Whiskey Babe]
Whiskey Babe: Oh yeah, that was quite a day. I don't
know why
Goths get so much grief.
I find them to be typically of above average intelligence, and for the most part
harmless.
John: What do Goths do during daytime hours?
Trashy Babe: Sit around watching Jerry Springer?
John: What are vampires doing on the beach?
Horny Babe: When it all comes down to it, is there
anywhere else to be?
Whiskey Babe: Marc and I have always loved old school
forms of
rock and roll: Jerry Lee
Lewis, Chuck Berry, and of course surf. And both of us love a lot of things
about the Goth scene: the music, the image, and a lot of the people. But the
problem is that Goths take themselves way too seriously. So on one had you've
got this Goth mentality, which is like "Look at me - I'm so dark and sad and
Victorian." Then there's the surf mentality, which is just like "Hey, it doesn't
matter what you look like, it's all one big party, so just grab your board and
catch a wave." And when you put them together you get something that is just so
beautifully twisted.
John: What is the scariest band on the planet?
Don't-You-Dare-Call-Me-Babe Babe: Definitely N Sync.
They absolutely terrify
me.
John: You've got a definite Cramps feel ("tomb mau
mau") to the music. Do you consider them Goths?
Horny Babe: We don't think much about the lines. If
we did, we wouldn't be
having so much fun crossing them. The Cramps aren't really Goth, but they have a
Goth following because what they do is so dark and sleazy.
John: With all that surfy twang in the music I thought
you'd be running with the
psychobilly crowd. Why hang with the Goths?
Whiskey Babe: In the Vampire Beach Babes there are a
lot of
different styles brought to
the table. I love psychobilly, and there are definite influences for us there.
But the Goth crowd seems to have really picked up on us first, and that's cool.
John: What is the best horror movie of all time?
Trashy Babe: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Whiskey Babe: The Cat People (the earlier version). I
really
liked Sleepy Hollow too.
Tim Burton is a God.
Don't-You-Dare-Call-Me-Babe Babe: Plan 9 from Outer
Space
Horny Babe: The Toxic Avenger
Bunny Babe: E.T.
John: What's the worst?
Whiskey Babe: There are no bad horror movies.
John: Do you still watch The Munsters and old Adams
Family reruns?
Whiskey Babe: Those are reruns?
Horny Babe: Damn, I thought the last couple looked
familiar.
Whiskey Babe: Seriously though, Fred Gwynne rocked!
Bunny Babe: I still have wet dreams about Lurch.
John: The CD has five members, and the website has
four. Who died?
Horny Babe: We have somewhat of an open format. Babes
join in for the ride for
a while, help us out and have some fun, and move on if and when they want. Once
a Babe, always a Babe.
Whiskey Babe: Everybody plays an integral part in the
mix.
We've had a few different
mixes, but everybody has actively contributed, especially to the live show.
John: Is the touring machine a 68 caddy?
Whiskey Babe: That's my Maybellene. She's a black '68
Coupe de
Ville: 2 and 1/2 tons
and 375 horses of American excess. But she's too good to do the grunt work of
touring - I save her for those dark midnight rides, cruising and listening to
the oldies. For touring we use my blood red Lincoln Town Car and the Baron's
black PT Cruiser.
John: Is there a long and sordid history to the band?
Don't-You-Dare-Call-Me-Babe Babe: Yes
John: What poster was hanging on your teenage bedroom
wall?
Horny Babe: Cleopatra
John: What moment in life turned you into rock and roll
players?
Whiskey Babe: I think it was when I was hit by
lightning.
Horny Babe: Which time?
John: What are your day jobs?
Bunny Babe: I'm a research analyst for Jet Propulsion
Labs in California.
Horny Babe: Oh dear, it sounds like she fell down the
stairs again.
John: What's the best place you've ever played?
Trashy Babe: Fetish New Years at the Reverb Club in
Toronto, last New Year's
Eve.
John: What's the worst?
Horny Babe: It was the show that never was - at the
Fratt House this summer. The P.A.
was blown, and after driving down and spending 3 hours trying to make it work we
had to pack it in and go home. It was a real drag.
John: What tv show should VBB appear on?
Bunny Babe: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
John: What movie should VBB have appeared in?
Horny Babe: The Lost Boys
John: What year would you set your time machine on, and
why?
Whiskey Babe: I'd say about 5 AD. Back then we were
doing our
"Messiah, what Messiah?"
tour of the Roman Empire. There was this sweet little slave girl that I'd just
like 5 more minutes with....
Horny Babe: Man that was a great tour! T-shirt sales
were staggering!
John: How are the VBB preparing for the impending world
war three?
Whiskey Babe: All kidding aside, we're doing what every
other
being with a soul is
doing now - praying for peace. People are people, and we really need to figure
out how to make it work.
Horny Babe: When it comes down to it, we all need a
little of that surf mentality:
relax, soak up the sun and have a good time.
....tape hiss...
Further Vampire Beach Babe dementia can be found at:
www.vampirebeachbabes.com.
You have been warned.
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